I’ve got a facebook account. But I don’t get it. I just don’t. Am I thick or has someone created a whole new paradigm for human/computer interfaces that no one told me about? (OK I know it’s about human/human communication/prattle but I can’t get past the chaos of facebook). Is it specifically designed to confuse the over 35s? Is it revenge for the mosquito device teenager repellent? What?

I get notifications about stuff other people have done to other people. I get regular emails from Owen asking me to play scabulous – I had to rely on his tech support to navigate around the screen looking for the damned application because the invite didn’t contain a link to the app.

Now Owen is cajoling me into joining a group about the Ball Surname in Ireland. Fine – after three days of web 2.0 compliant insults I relent and decide to join.

Where’s the join button? Where do I point the mouse thing [picks up mouse and waves it at the screen] to make me join the group. There is no link in the invite. There is no flashing spinning button that says “join this group be-atch”

How come I feel like such a fscking idiot every time I log on there? I’ve been blogging since early 2003, I’m hip, I’m cool, why don’t I get it?

Answers via postcard please.

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